The key to living well through times of change and uncertainty is to take personal responsibility for your “self” care.

Prolonged stress leads to anger, depression and illness.  The more responsibility you take for yourself, the more easily you are able to navigate the roads of change.

 What is optimal “self” care and how can you practice it?

Self care requires truly understanding yourself from the inside out and balancing the needs of your body, mind and spirit.   It involves taking time to nourish yourself every day and knowing your trigger points.  Once you are aware of different stressors that impact you, you can learn tools, techniques and resources to draw on whenever needed.

Unfortunately adaptation to stress has become so commonplace that it is often a major obstacle to the self awareness necessary for skilled self care. It is easy to become so used to “the way things are’ that you believe you are not being affected by stress. This mind set is one that will allow stress to silently but steadily erode health over time.

An important first step to changing this is to pay attention to the feeling of overwhelm….a sense that there is too much to do in too short a time…..feelings of overload. These are feelings that are so widespread that they are often dismissed or accepted as par for the course. However, it is at this stage that there is a prime opportunity to change the way your body and mind are affected by stress.

More often than not you are aware of the conscious thoughts that flow through your mind. Beneath them is another stream of thought that has a lot more to do with your real feelings, beliefs and views about yourself, others and life itself! Because of the nature of the ‘conversation’ at this level, no amount of intellectual planning or strategizing will be effective in supplying the long term solutions needed to maintain balanced health.

What is the answer? To give ourselves time on a regular basis to let the conscious mind quiet down so we may hear the deeper river of thought and feeling that moves through us. It is here that the all important self knowledge resides. Once we understand what is happening there, we can release old worn out beliefs that no longer serve us, erase negative thoughts and feelings and create a fertile ground for approaches that will genuinely guide us toward the life we want to live.

It is in that ‘space’ that you will come to really know yourself and be able to not only understand your triggers, but also have a clearer knowledge regarding what the solutions are. As brilliant as your everyday mind is, it is your quieter ‘inner self’ that holds the wisdom that will bring you to a rich, satisfying healthy way of being. In this quieter space questions can be asked that guide you toward your own strategic plan for inner world peace!

Next time–Questions to help you create inner peace…

When we are in times of increased stress, overwhelm and powerlessness such as those created by natural disasters,it is crucial to maintain, center and ground our energy. 

Our energy is our power. Binding it or dissipating it contributes to feelings of powerlessness, fear, confusion, constriction or pressure.

To cope with stress we are inclined to increase, decrease or freeze our energy. An increase or excess of energy to cope is manifested as a pattern of overcompensation for fear or weakness. We see this in people who dominate situations and people. On the surface this may look like a powerful approach. However, internally the excessive energy required to accomplish this behavioral style tends to become stagnate and create a health problem for the individual in whatever area of the body the excess was accumulated.

A decrease in energy or a freezing response is manifested in withdrawal in order to avoid conflict or challenge. This deficient energy state results in a feeling of being unable to cope, or have what it takes to work through situations, hence they retreat. Unfortunately this often has the consequence of reinforcing the original state and the person experiences even more of a sense of emptiness, restriction, and uselessness.

Our bodies and habits give us clues as to how we are managing our energies in response to stress. In addition to behavior, an outward manifestation of how we are managing energy is reflected in the shape our body takes, as well as in how we carry ourselves. On the positive side, our energy system is highly responsive to change and there are a wide variety of approaches that can be used for transformation.

Breath awareness and management is perhaps the simplest and most basic way to begin to be conscious of your energy patterns as well as providing you with a great method to begin to build and flow energy more easily.

Improper breathing patterns contribute to the experience of stress, anxiety, panic, depression, muscle tension, headache and fatigue. Healthy breathing practice is a key factor in the release of stress, energy flow and improvement of physical and psychological well being.

Energy & Healthy Breathing

• Proper oxygenation increases electrical charge at cellular level
• Negative ions facilitate release of carbon dioxide
• Negative ions promote passage of oxygen into bloodstream
• Positive ions have opposite effect
• Diaphragmatic breathing enhances shearing action of blood flow
• Shearing action of blood flow enhances energy

The strength, flow and frequencies of your energy system determine your overall mental and physical health. In Energy Psychology, emotional imbalance is viewed as a disruption in the flow of energy through the chakras and meridians. Similarly, in Energy Medicine, physical pain is thought to be caused by this disruption. Although each of these disciplines views the disruption of energy at a different place on the continuum of progression from mind to body, both of these approaches relieve pain and restore health by treating the human energy system. If you are aware of how your energy system relates to your well-being, it is easy to understand why this is so.
There are two ways that chakras influence your health: they “feed” your endocrine glands, and they “feed” your aura. Let’s first consider their affect on your endocrine system.
In her book, Molecules of Emotion: The Science behind Mind-Body Medicine, Dr. Candace Pert describes the chakras as “minibrains”: nodal points of electrical and chemical activity that receive process and distribute information from and to the rest of your “bodymind.”
These minibrains reside in the midline of your body, where there is also an endocrine gland and a major nerve plexus. The seven endocrine glands are fed by their associated chakras. The endocrine glands manufacture hormones and supply them to the bloodstream, where they are carried to the organs and tissues in your body. The seven nerve plexuses, which are also located along your spinal cord, are responsible for transmitting nerve impulses. They are also dense with neuropeptides.
Neuropeptides have been dubbed the “molecules of emotion” as they are the chemistry associated with our emotions. They do not rely on transmission through the nervous system. If you are experiencing happiness, for example, you will find neuropeptides associated with happiness in your body; if you are sad, there will be ”sad” neuropeptides in your body, and so forth.
Each of the seven areas that contain these structures can be seen as a model of the bodymind. Your endocrine gland represents your body; the neuropeptides your emotions; the nerve plexus correlates with your mind; the subtle energy of the chakra correlates with your spirit. If a chakra is damaged it may cause disruption in the function of its associated endocrine gland. And, because the activity of the endocrine glands and nerve plexuses is interrelated and interdependent, if an endocrine gland isn’t functioning properly, it may affect your entire bodymind.
The more you understand the flow of subtle energy, the more you can see how your thoughts, emotions, spirit and physical body are interrelated. The activity of any one aspect ultimately affects each of the others. Your thoughts influence your emotions. Your thoughts and emotions influence your spirit. Your thoughts, emotions and spirit energy are reflected in the health of your physical body. An imbalance in your body can drag you down … depressing your spirit, emotions and leading to negative thoughts. It is a two way street and can well turn into a never ending feedback loop of increasing negativity unless there is intervention to shift the process.
No matter what level of disruption is present, it can always be helpful to use some form of energy work. Obviously the deeper the problem the more different types of intervention may be advisable or required to bring about healing.
In any case, as we view our energetic anatomy and the clear model of mind-body-spirit that it provides it becomes even more obvious that we need to address ourselves, our lives and our health with a comprehensive approach that treats us as a Whole Being!

If you are interested in learning how to improve the energy of  your chakras and your life….

Our CD, Energy Aerobics, provides a guided meditation to help you to clear blocks, release negativity and strengthen your chakras.

Chakras and Feng Shui is a complete program to understand your inner and outer energy, their relationship with guidance on how to use various energetic approaches to open the flow of energy within every area of your life.

Defining the issue … Do you ever notice that your anger seems out of bounds for the current situation? If you find yourself in such a situation, it can be helpful to ask yourself if this anger has roots in an earlier life situation. Do you remember a time in the past when you first felt this way, or a time when this feeling was particularly meaningful? Often anger that has been allowed to fester or left unaddressed goes underground only to reemerge with the power and heat of steam blowing out of a pressure cooker!

 Long held childhood wounds to the self can be touched off by a passing remark or a stranger’s behavior. Asking some very direct questions about your self image, sense of personal identity and power and beliefs can be helpful.  When anger has its roots in an earlier, perhaps traumatic or abusive time, it may be important to have some support and guidance moving through the process of healing and release.

If anger seems to have become a well-worn rut in your nervous system, it can take time and a multifaceted approach to change or release it. For some people a support group that focuses positively on anger management can offer support, understanding and skill building.  There are also many books on this topic and many of them are written in workbook format so you may go through the stages of processing and learning at your own speed.  

Anger can be healthy … On the opposite end of the spectrum from explosive anger is suppression. There is a belief in some cultures that anger is never justified. The rationale is that if we are good, kind, spiritual etc., we will never be angry.  It is important to remember that anger, just like other feelings, is a natural, human and may even have a deeper message that is important for you to note. For instance, anger can be a signal to you that your boundaries have been crossed, or that you have been insulted, devalued or dismissed. Knowing how to use anger as a signal of something deeper and having the ability to respond appropriately to the situation is be healthy for us physiologically as well as for our relationships.

 Recognition of healthy anger … One way we can know if anger is appropriate and healthy is if it dissipates once we have acknowledged and expressed our feelings. Often healthy anger needs nothing more than honest, direct, non-harmful expression.  When this is not the case then anger may be pent up rage and it needs to be dealt with in a different way.  Rage is a more complex state and usually needs to be worked in stages and it is often better to have guidance and support with this kind of experience.

 Positive tools for releasing anger … Writing letters, punching pillows or banging nails, art therapy, verbal expression to the air or to a willing friend or therapist are all appropriate outlets for releasing anger. These methods help to bleed off some of the energy that would initially make problem resolution impossible. Once the intensity has been dealt with, other techniques focused on resolution can be employed.  It should be noted when contemplating cathartic tools, that neurological pathways can be grooved deeper forming a superhighway for anger to become a way of being rather than a release of the pent up energy. We are meant to feel but not to get stuck in any one emotion habitually or for extended periods.

 Children’s spontaneous expression of emotion and return to play and laughter is a model for healthy expression. Letting yourself feel an emotion without resistance and guiding it toward release works in most cases.  It is crucial to include release as part of your process.

It is beneficial to get help recognizing and releasing deeply held anger.  Meditation and breathwork are useful to identify hidden areas of anger and its sources. Certain types of breath work are particularly helpful when a deep release of patterns from the bodymind is required.  EFT and EF&H are two energetic techniques that can be very effective for releasing anger.  The beauty of using these tools is that you don’t need to know the source of your anger, you simply need a willingness to let it go.

Have you ever felt that red hot angry energy that builds up in you and creates the sense that you may explode at any moment? Or how about that seething inner burn that feels like it is frying your nerve endings? Or maybe emotional outbursts or frustrated crying jags are more your preferred style of anger management (actually those ARE a bit healthier than the former!!) Toxic anger in all its forms blocks and drains your energy.

 We all pretty much know what different kinds of anger feel like, but we often don’t think about or realize that there are very definite and possibily long term serious effects on our bodies and minds—nevermind on our relationships and lives!

So with anger, like with so many other stressful symptoms, we simply endure and wait for time to pass which gives us the illusion that we have  released and/or are “over it”. What in fact generally happens is that the emotion has been granted the favor of time for it to sink down into the recesses of our minds and bodies –only to come out and play another day or to wear away at our health, temperament and maybe even relationships.

 Imagine a continuum with ‘toxic anger’ on the negative end and ‘healthy anger’ on the positive end.  Examples of toxic anger are perhaps most often seen in newspaper headlines reporting events that result when people or countries maintain worldviews of hatred and negativity. Further along on the continuum is a less volatile type of anger that is characterized by injustice collection. The predictable companions of this form of anger are resentment and bitterness.  Another mode of anger, usually accompanied by profound silence, is the type that is turned inward to form a core of self loathing and hatred.

 For some people anger and its accompanying chemistry become addictive. Fortunately, anger does not develop into an extreme toxic, addictive or permanent state for most of us.  However, since it is something that we all experience, it is helpful to understand, manage, and learn from and about this powerful emotion.

 Nervous system imbalances, hormonal disruptions and stress related biochemistry can be involved in both the origin and maintenance of anger.  Red flags for these situations are: compulsive features, too much intensity for the situation at hand, and out of control qualities. Psychological and cognitive understanding alone do little if anything  to release a person from this kind of turmoil. The physical reactions/states must be addressed along with deeper insight and new learning to manage anger in a healthy and balanced way.

Next time: Solutions to Release Anger

Are you feeling the results of the harsh, cold and unyielding temperatures on your patience? The already difficult season of winter becomes even more unbearable when we are besieged by extremes of temperature, as well as continuous ice or snow storms!

 Is there a way to make peace with this season?  Is there a means to find not just respite, but maybe even an appreciation of this quieter, less active, time of the year?

 Of course there are many approaches that help us tolerate and get through this time: winter sports, vacations, new hobbies and interests. These are all worthwhile and useful alternatives to enable us to withstand the long, cold, and dark season.

 There are also choices in how we view this time of year that can help reduce some of the stress and frustration. We can look at winter as a teacher. We can open ourselves to learn something from this season that we are used to just enduring. Years ago we would have laughed at such an approach! Finally it occurred to us that our attitude was not working. So we thought a trial run of a different point of view couldn’t hurt.  We found that it not only didn’t hurt, it in fact helped…a lot!

 The natural world has much to teach us about flowing with cycles and changes…how to be patient and go with the flow rather than fight what is.  If you allow it, winter’s journey can be a kind of spinning inward, a letting go of resistance to all that you find harsh, cold and unyielding. Within the short and cold days of winter, there is a lot of magic and beauty.  It can be a time of quiet reflection, a time to learn how to turn your attention inward. When you do this, the possibility opens to learning how to become friends with a slower, quieter, less active pace. You can welcome the respite from the over-activity of the holidays, and warmer seasons. By slowing down and going inward, you may discover that solutions come to you more easily.  You may also discover that you can get more done in less time.  You may discover that you like the new pace and improved balance.

 However, there are challenges to implementing these ideas! We seem to resist slowing down. We are used to such a high level of activity, and have such high expectations for every area of our lives, that it is hard to slow down. We have all cooperated in the creation of lives so full of action that is hard to change. In spite of warnings regarding health, our own unrest and feelings of distress with the pace, we continue onward as if it is impossible to change.

 You are, whether you choose to believe it or not, the change agent and meaning maker of your life. So if you are to have something new enter your existence, you will have to make room for it and put it there. You will have to align your energy with your intentions and get ready to receive everything you are asking for.  Whatever you ask for, will come.  How about beginning with the willingness to entertain some new ideas?

 Nature’s wisdom follows predictable, repeatable cycles of change and growth. Winter’s time of ‘darkness’ is a resting time, a space where there is a deep process of renewal and rejuvenation happening before the grand explosion of life in spring.

 Winter provides us with a similar experience. With a somewhat slower pace of life you can take the opportunity to give yourself a gift of time each day for quiet reflection. You can learn to enter into this state that nature models so gracefully. How do you do this? One way is to practice some form of meditation, deep relaxation, and contemplation or prayer as a daily routine. This may be difficult at first for many reasons. It may feel as though nothing is happening or that you are not being productive, responsible or worthwhile. As you become more familiar with spending time in this type of activity, you will gradually become aware, however, of how profoundly it can impact your life in ways that support the values you cherish.

 Deep within each of us, is the need for quiet; for the kind of rest that replenishes and nourishes our bodies, minds and spirits. There is a place inside that understands and knows how to BE. However, you need to access it, it will not force its way into your life. You access it by slowing down, tuning in and listening to everything within your body and soul.  When you provide the means to travel there, your life is greatly enriched for the brief investment of time that you make.

 What are the benefits of learning to spend this kind of time?

• You may find a kind of rest you did not think was possible.
• You can discover that silence will teach you things you didn’t know.
• You can develop new perspectives, new views that help you in practical ways.
• You may realize the difference between knowledge and understanding.
• You may find you are more than a constant process of doing.
• You may find that by slowing down you actually accomplish more with less effort.
• You may rediscover your creativity and simple solutions to everyday problems.
• You may find that you really enjoy and cherish this time.
• You can develop a reliable source of renewal, guidance, support and problem solving.

 All relationships need attention, time and space to grow. Winter provides the possibility for a new kind of relationship—with yourself. This relationship is grown and nurtured internally. It is deceptively quiet and subtle, but like winter, it can be powerful in the gifts it brings: expansion, growth, warmth, beauty …your own personal Spring!  Go inward this winter and nurture the seeds of change and growth within you.  Contemplate what you really want in your life and make room in your heart and soul for its arrival.  Align your thoughts and your energy with your intentions on a daily basis.

 Make a commitment to nurture yourself this winter.  Align your spirit with Nature’s cycles.  When spring arrives, the seeds of winter will burst forth will new life and vigor.

From a NY Times article

… The researchers report that those who meditated for about 30 minutes a day for eight weeks had measurable changes in gray-matter density in parts of the brain associated with memory, sense of self, empathy and stress.

M.R.I. brain scans taken before and after the participants’ meditation regimen found increased gray matter in the hippocampus, an area important for learning and memory. The images also showed a reduction of gray matter in the amygdala, a region connected to anxiety and stress. A control group that did not practice meditation showed no such changes.

Britta Hölzel, a psychologist at Massachusetts General Hospital and Harvard Medical School and the study’s lead author, said the participants practiced mindfulness meditation, a form of meditation that was introduced in the United States in the late 1970s. It traces its roots to ancient Buddhist techniques….

“The main idea is to use different objects to focus one’s attention, and it could be a focus on sensations of breathing, or emotions or thoughts, or observing any type of body sensations,” she said. “But it’s about bringing the mind back to the here and now, as opposed to letting the mind drift.”

Generally the meditators are seated upright on a chair or the floor and in silence, although sometimes there might be a guide leading a session, Dr. Hölzel said.

… a 2009 study suggests that meditation may reduce blood pressure in patients with coronary heart disease. And a 2007 study found that meditators have longer attention spans.

Previous studies have also shown that there are structural differences between the brains of meditators and those who don’t meditate, although this new study is the first to document changes in gray matter over time through meditation.

Ultimately, Dr. Hölzel said she and her colleagues would like to demonstrate how meditation results in definitive improvements in people’s lives.

“A lot of studies find that it increases well-being, improves quality of life, but it’s always hard to determine how you can objectively test that,” she said. “Relatively little is known about the brain and the psychological mechanisms about how this is being done.”

In a 2008 study published in the journal PloS One, researchers found that when meditators heard the sounds of people suffering, they had stronger activation levels in their temporal parietal junctures, a part of the brain tied to empathy, than people who did not meditate.

“They may be more willing to help when someone suffers, and act more compassionately,” Dr. Hölzel said.

Click here for the article:

http://http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2011/01/28/how-meditation-may-change-the-brain/?src=me&ref=general

“Mindfulness is the miracle by which we can call back in a flash our dispersed mind and restore it to wholeness so that we can live each minute of life.” Thich Nhat Hanh, The Miracle of Mindfulness

It is well known that stress is a primary force in the development of ill health. Most people are well aware of the signs of stress even if they are reluctant to do anything about them. Implementing a stress management program is a great thing to do. However, if you do this with the attitude that it is one more task to be done it can, it can be a burden that is easily given up.

An attitude that includes a:
Healthy sense of self worth 
Deep inner commitment to one’s well being 
Recognition of link between optimal health and happiness

… makes the time spent a joy and increases your benefit immeasurably.

 Finding time to care for oneself is so often seen as less important than caring for others, especially when their need is so great and crucially important. Our culture generally does not value self care or encourage it to be at the top of the list of “things to do for success.” However, when you live in the world as a care-giver, to neglect this aspect is to sign up for trouble physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually.

What is ONE thing you can do today to begin to take better care of YOU?

The world will thank you!